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The Oyster Wedding Portraits and the Scary Moment

Posted by M Sunday, August 21, 2011 at 6:49 PM

While I didn't want them to be the focus of the wedding day, like most people, I believe portraits are important. There is something historical and timeless about seeing your family, dressed formally, arranged just so, looking right into the camera. And of course, the sentimental part of me imagines going through them many years from now with my kids, saying, "And this is your aunt so & so, and this is your cousin, and this person and this person, etc. etc..."

We didn't have a long list of portraits. We requested bridal party shots, some creative portraits of my husband and I, and of course, family. My husband and I also took photos with each set of parents. After the ceremony, we only had two large family portraits: one with my family, one with his.

For the few family portraits required in advance, we just asked our immediate family members to be there a few minutes early (if they're your immediate family, they were probably planning to be there early anyway). This worked out well, especially for my grandmother, who wasn't up to being around for the entire wedding day (helping with my dress, early photos, etc.). All she would have to do was take a photo or two, and then wait a few minutes for the ceremony.

We got around to the family photos, and Grandmother hadn't been feeling well. But she insisted that she was fine for portraits, and we managed to take one that I like very much:

Out of the corner of my eye, though, she got a little wobbly, and then began to pass out. I grabbed her and held her up, and there was some chaos, and I remember saying firmly, to no one in particular, "Get a chair." Mr. Oyster got one quickly, and we put Grandmother in it. Our photographer, to his credit, smiled warmly and remarked that the portraits would look better anyway with Grandmother sitting down. She was awake and wanted to continue, but the photos we took after that are just too painful to look at. We are smiling, but Grandmother looks pretty out of it, and I was close to tears.

In this one, she is recovered, and my mom is laughing after I told her to come closer. "I didn't want to step on your beautiful dress," she had said. As if that would even matter to me! Come here, Mom! And I gave her a hug.

My grandmother is diabetic, and luckily it was just a very sudden drop in blood sugar that caused her to nearly faint. We are very lucky that we have many family members who are diabetics themselves or are experienced in caring for them, so we had plenty of support and she was well cared for.

But I couldn't help but remember the time two months prior, when my grandmother was in a week-long coma and the doctors encouraged my mom to "find her will." We were suddenly and starkly reminded of that, and it was unsettling. It was a difficult thing to think about on the day of the wedding. (Incidentally, my grandmother, who'd been talking about the wedding just before she'd passed out, woke from her coma once, unable to remember anything except one word before going back to sleep: "Texas." She was determined, y'all.) However, my grandmother did make an incredible recovery later that evening, as you'll see in the reception photos!

Family is important. Candids are wonderful and they tell a significant story of your day, but I'm very happy to have these photos.

Photos by the Chicago based photographers, David Wittig Photography.

Previously:

The Oyster Wedding: More than a Bridal Party

Posted by M Monday, August 8, 2011 at 11:40 PM

After our couples' portraits it was time for bridal party photos, which I'll show you in a minute. But I couldn't do that without briefly introducing you to my two closest and dearest friends.

When I thought about the people I'd like standing by me on my wedding day, I knew that it would likely be a very short list. I don't have any sisters, but I'm the oldest of 7 girl-cousins! However, they all live far away and are in various stages of college/early career (in fact, only one would make it to the wedding) and I was thinking it would have been a hassle for them to deal with being bridesmaids. Also, our wedding was pretty small, and if I'd had my family up there with me, no one would have been left to be in the audience!

So I immediately thought of my two best friends: My friend E, whom I've known since graduate school (the one whose bridal shower I showed you a while back):

Young friends in 2007

...and my friend J, who teaches in my same district, and has become like a sister. J is my "silly" friend and we are always laughing together and having a great time. We have a ton of inside jokes and sometimes have to avoid looking at each other to keep from laughing at inappropriate times. I don't have too many photos with her but I do treasure this photo of her that I took during one of our (many!) silly times together:

laughing in 2008

We had a pretty relaxed schedule, and we didn't leave the Tower Club building, so there was lots of time for hanging out and walking around.

We did have official "bridal party portraits," but I like this outtake too. I'd just said something and I love the way my friend E was looking at me.

Did you notice their dresses? Believe it or not, E's dress is from David's Bridal, and J's dress is from... wait for it... a thrift shop.

J and I had gone shopping last spring for a dress for her to wear to her stepdaughter's wedding, just a few months before mine (I mentioned it briefly in this post) and decided to visit the Rose Garden, a thrift shop/charity operation south of downtown Dallas.

We found this amazing, perfectly-colored, perfectly-fitting Lazaro dress in perfect condition for just $25 (less than one-tenth its original price). It was too good to pass up. Of course, there was only one, so I called E and told her that we'd found a dress. Luckily, she was a good sport about it and found herself a similar-enough dress at David's Bridal.

Both my girls look amazing, and I'm so happy to have had them with me for my wedding. Aren't they so elegant?

The three of us are all pianists and music teachers. Here, we look like a formidable singing group.

Oh, and my husband had some groomsmen, too. His two cousins, who are brothers, provided immeasurable support that day and we're honored that they were with us! The three of them look quite a bit alike. Here they are about to make a wedding offer I wouldn't refuse.

We had some smaller members of our party, too. My little brother was our ringbearer, and he did an adorable job. Here he is looking pretty pensive:

We also had an honorary member of the bridal party. E's little daughter, who stole the show at our engagement party, was just a baby when we got engaged. It seemed really weird to say, "I know your child can't walk, sit, or crawl yet, but can she be a flower girl in our wedding 18 months from now?" So I left it alone.

At the wedding though, she was super cute in her little pink dress. When we weren't looking, she walked over to her mom's bouquet and plucked herself a big rose; here she is showing off her find.

She carried it around all day, like she knew what she was doing! So she was our "honorary flower girl." So cute!

We were so lucky to have these four (well, six if you count the little ones) to help us on our wedding day. I've always loved those wedding-day photos that show the bride surrounded by a gaggle of girlfriends wearing matching robes or something... but that's never been my reality. I loved our super-small bridal party, and I couldn't have asked for better friends to share my day with.

Photos, unless otherwise noted, by David Wittig Photography.

Previously:

The Oyster Wedding: Fun With Cameras

Posted by M Monday, July 4, 2011 at 7:25 PM

You may have noticed a little detail in my preview post from a few weeks ago:

Mr. Oyster and I met in a photography class, and we're both photographers (I shoot portraits sometimes; my talented husband is a lifelong artist with a history of working with film; he also takes catalog-worthy photos of artwork). So for our "couples' portraits," we thought it might be fun to take some portraits with our cameras.
I brought my Nikon, and Mr. Oyster brought his brand new (but really old) Mamiya. This was probably the most fun part of the portrait session.

No matter how much I love my camera, I didn't realize until this moment that you cannot hold the camera to your eye without threatening to mess up your makeup and false eyelashes:

I'm not a super-photographer or anything (and definitely have no plans to get into weddings!), but I have always wanted a "bride with camera" shot. Very early in my wedding planning, I was inspired by this cool shot from photographer Justine Ungaro's wedding, shot by Greg Gibson. (I also really loved Justine's "Unbride" wedding blog when I was engaged.)

I don't even think I told my photographers about my secret little dream, and I still ended up with my own cool shot:

Holding the camera was a lot more natural to me than holding a bunch of flowers!

I also managed to take two shots of my own. I call these "the two Davids." One is my husband, and the other is the photographer:

(personal photos)

My husband took a shot or two himself, but can you believe -- he hasn't developed them yet!
We returned to the aforementioned restaurant, and walked around in the lobby as well. I think this one is my favorite "non-smiling" formal portrait:

I like this version, too. Mr. Oyster says he thinks he looks "goofy," but I like it, since we actually look at each other like this a lot of the time.

After our first look, Mr. Oyster didn't do anything dramatic, like burst into tears or anything. Much later, he told me what he'd been thinking. But at some point during the portraits, I said, "What do you think of my dress?" and he said, "I love it. It's like a creature." A creature?

He said he loved the way the dress moved around, with its shimmery fabric, especially since you couldn't see my feet. It looked like a creature. "Well, a beautiful creature," he said.

Even though I'd already had my bridal portraits, I'm so happy to have some images of me "on my wedding day." Here are my favorites:

(I like this photo because I look a lot like my dad in it):

Mr. Oyster's favorite photos of himself are the ones from different times, like before the photo session, but he takes a nice portrait, too:

This was really our only quiet time together all day. It was so nice to take portraits without anyone else around, and to just enjoy each other for a bit before the "wedding-ness" started.

*Photos, unless otherwise noted, by David Wittig Photography.

Previously:

The Oyster Wedding: Unveiled

Posted by M Wednesday, June 29, 2011 at 1:15 AM

We planned for our portraits to be right after the "getting ready" time, both because we really liked the idea of the "first look," and because, well at least for me, I thought it would be nice to have portraits right after having my hair and makeup done, as opposed to several hours later.

We also decided to do the "unveiling." Since I was not being given away, and I was wearing a veil, I was either going to have to have Mr. Oyster unveil me at the altar (an idea that made me feel weird) or just have it open all the time. So at the last minute, we decided it would be nice for Mr. Oyster to get to do it during our first look. He loved this idea and was looking forward to it. I know this from the many veil-related jokes he made the entire week before the wedding.

When I selected our venue, I took one look at the restaurant and knew that's where I wanted our portraits to be. I love the backgrounds (you'll see more of them in our portraits), and it gets great light!

I let the photographers arrange us and set up the first look however they wanted. I was standing in the window, and Mr. Oyster was to come over to me, and then we would, well, look at each other.

In the category of "weird memories from your wedding day," I remember that the restaurant was supposed to be closed and empty at that time of day, which it was, except for two people sitting behind me having a weird business-y, gossip-y conversation. They were speaking in that way people do when they know they should be quiet, but can't. It was a little weird and I was totally distracted by it... I really wished I could have had a second to gather my thoughts.

But they were, of course, welcome to be in the restaurant; certainly more than me, who was standing around in a wedding dress. I suddenly felt incredibly awkward and very conspicuous.

It didn't last long though, and I eventually started playing around with the veil, which is what I was doing when I first saw Mr. Oyster:

I asked my husband if he remembers what he felt when he was getting ready to see me for the first time, and he said that he was "nervous, and excited, and happy to get married, and interested to see how you were going to look, and you were very beautiful."

The best thing about seeing these pictures is knowing that my husband looks at me like this every day. :)

Oops... I guess we decided not to wait until the altar for our first kiss, either. These might be my favorite two shots from the entire day:

I didn't have too many deep thoughts about this part of the day; I loved seeing Mr. Oyster and thought he looked incredibly handsome, but I think most of the suspense was for him. I thought I might be more emotional, seeing as how our "first look" was really the start of our wedding day, but I was really just very calm and very happy.

Photos by Chicago photographers David Wittig Photography.

Previously:

The Oyster Wedding: Get Ready

Posted by M Sunday, June 19, 2011 at 6:45 PM

One of the benefits of having a well-padded schedule is that you have built in room for things like solving crises and "emergency hug" visits to your family. So when I arrived at the venue an hour later than I'd originally planned, it was no big deal.

I remember having a tremendous difficulty trying to park the van in the garage and carry all my things up to the venue. The Tower Club is on the 48th floor of an office building, and since it was a Friday afternoon, there were still some business-y people around. Several of them didn't even try to hide their amusement at the sight of this "live bride walking." It was fun. In one hand, I wheeled my suitcase, and in the other, I held my wedding dress high over my head. I was frazzled, but also feeling very peaceful and happy. I must have been quite a sight!

This is where I get to thank my stylist, Bridgett H. Bridgett has been my hairstylist for four years now, and she has really taken the time to get to know me while also being a little no-nonsense. She quickly de-frazzled me by requiring me to relax and take a break; she got me some water and said it was important that I start the day very calmly. She is brilliant.

I hung up my dress,

and changed into my yellow get-ready robe (I kept my pants on under it; for some reason I suddenly didn't want to be pants-less with all those people who were going to be around me) and we got started. (*Note: Some of these photos are a bit out of order, as Bridgett and I had been working on hair/makeup for an hour or two before the photographers arrived.)

I think the "getting ready" stage was probably the calmest part of the day. For a while, it was just Bridgett and I, and it was pretty quiet.

The men were getting ready in another part of the building. Since their "getting ready" process was soooo much simpler than ours, there was plenty of time to hang around each other and tease Mr. Oyster about marriage.

Mr. Oyster says that it was very quiet while they were waiting for people to arrive and to start getting ready. Here, my cousin works on her knitting (she's amazingly talented -- more on that later).

My two maids-of-honor arrived (that is my whole bridal party, just those two), and I was happy to see them. It was impossible not to react to everyone's happy, anticipatory mood.

Bridgett was in the final stages of hair and makeup. They watched with interest.

When my hair and makeup was done, Bridgett wished me well and said goodbye:

It was time to put on The Dress.

A long, long time ago, I mentioned working with the seamstress, Nazhly Montilla. One of the things included in her service is that she comes to the venue on your wedding day (if it's local) to dress the bride; sort of a final send-off to her work of art, I imagine. I was so happy to have Nazhly there to help. She also took the time to show my maids how to do the bustle.

Nazhly zipped me up (here I am not being indignant, I'm just holding the dress), and it must have been tremendously funny: